The Power of Questioning
We are sitting on a trajectory where people tend to ask fewer questions.
Why is the sky blue? Why do stars only come out in the night? Where are the dinosaurs living now? And where did I come from?
I guess we have all been bombarded by these kid’s questions, whether they are from your little quiz machine or the quizzical boy in your neighborhood. A study found that a four-year-old kid spits out at least 73 questions every day. I know many parents may argue this is a ridiculously low number. Maybe the study didn’t count the single-worded questions: Why? Why? Why?
Luckily, a questioning child is less annoying than an inquisitive adult. We know kids are trying to understand this world through the lens of questions. So we love them no matter how silly the questions are. But are we grown-ups finished learning this world? Well given the size of the world and how short life is, the difference in knowledge between a kid and an adult is almost ignorable. We need to know this world as much as the kids. But sadly, it seems we are sitting on a trajectory where people tend to ask fewer questions while growing up and accept everything as the way it is.
We are passing on this trajectory from one generation to the next. I am sure my son asked me many years ago, “Dad, why do I have to go to school?” And my answer was for sure like, “You will learn knowledge there.” You see, involuntarily, I told him that any behavior outside the school was not meant to feed his curiosity.
Luckily, we have some exceptions in history — one of the reasons humans are still evolving. Socrates used to publicly question everything — from the validity of theories to the very nature of existence. In the Buddhist teachings, they encourage the students to “Question everything, no matter where you read it, or who said it.” They consider questioning as a catalyst for personal growth.
I often wonder why we’ve stopped asking questions. The fear of judgment? Having lost the sense of curiosity? Apparently it’s not the second case for me. I love questions. Like many fellow toastmasters, I love the Table Topics session in a Toastmasters meeting. In this game, we are allowed to act like a kid and ask all these childish yet oftentimes hit-your-heart questions, like, “What superpower do you want?” “You have money to buy the whole world, now what?” or “What would you do if you had a time machine?” We may laugh first at these questions. Then deep in heart something strikes a chord. The bouncy curiosity has come back, at least for a moment.
I still have a lot of kid’s questions in my head. Why my featured filler words while speaking in public are “so, so” while others are “you know, you know” or “like, like”? Is it a good idea to open a speech with a joke? Is it true that every speech should end with a call to action? A long list. Why I think they are childish? Because either I am telling myself they are silly questions or it won’t matter to find the answers for them. As we are sitting on this lifelong trajectory, I know these questions will fade away over time.
Although I don’t have the courage to spit them out like a kid anymore, I appreciate the time when they are lingering in my head. Because they help keep my curiosity alive and fill the tank for my journey of learning and growth. Albert Einstein said this about curiosity, “The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing.”
Do you know why kids are growing leaps and bounds every day? It’s because questioning has a superpower that many adults have forgotten that they still possess. Remember, it’s through questions that we truly get to know and understand this world that we live.
Dear friends, how many questions have you asked today? 73?
